You may be wondering what happened with the Challenger. It didn't happen. I was planning to go with a group of people, you see, and about an hour before the show was to go on, the people informed me that they had better things to do. I think doing an eating challenge with a group of friends cheering you on would be a lot of fun, but there's no real point doing it if there's no one there to see it. Thus, I cancelled. Names will not be named, and if you're one of the people and don't like that I'm anonymously referencing you, well I guess we're even.
According to my AdSense page, I've gone over a thousand hits (1,011 to be exact) since I put the ads on this son of a bitch. February 22nd to May 5th, not too bad. Let's do some math. March and April have 61 days combined. Add the last 6 in February and the first 5 in May, that's 72! 1,011 hits divided by 72 is....more than 14 hits per day (see, isn't math fun!?). Not bad, but we can do better. Yes, we can! Yes, we can! (That's what Obama says.) According to the AdSense page, "ad clicks must come from genuine user interest," thus I'm not allowed to encourage you to click them. So I'm NOT telling you to go ahead and just click the hell out of these things. I'm NOT telling you that whenever you need to make a Google search, why not head on over to Denim Douche and use my search, at the top or bottom of the page. Not telling you to do that.
Also, you may have noticed that my ads will often involve seemingly random topics triggered by words that I use in my posts. Repeated self-referencing has lead to a run of Douche related products, and even a slightly hilarious website called "Nomorefishysmell.com." Now, they're all related to recycling. Hmm. I think it's time to perform an experiment, if you'll allow me. I'm just going to fire out a whole list of random words to see if it affects the ads. Ready? *Deep breath...*
football cheese soda walnuts hairspray sea lions queens polio applesauce beetles cats desks lights killer whales samuel l jackson sigourney weaver tom hanks muppets the office zebras guitars buffalo wings drums pencils glue toilet paper shoes.
We'll see what happens, I guess. Maybe I'll get in trouble from AdSense.
One more thing, you've just got to do this;
National Sex Offender Registry
The national sex offender registry; the place where you can enter your street and your hometown and become frighteningly aware of just how many sex offenders there are around you. Sleep with one eye open, fish!
The best part is, the sex offenders look exactly like you'd expect them to. Be sure to use this for profiling purposes.
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